K.I.S.S. and Tellin’ It

by The Writer


Keeping It Strictly Single

Comparing your love life with others will only leave you broken hearted. –Nikki Novo

Lately I’ve been doing other things, which has kept me from posting (more on that later).  I have been writing, but it’s been a different journey I plan to share soon.  But, an interesting situation that occurred in the bowels of a local nightclub got me thinking about my situation… I’ve thought about sharing dating experiences, but I think I’ll leave that to the women who seem to be doing a better job at it.  Women seem to be having a tough time out there, but I realized that men do also, they just don’t really discuss it.  But, I digress…

Like everyone else, I have many personal issues to deal with, but one ‘problem’ that I wasn’t aware of seems to be coming up quite often as of late– I’m aware of the situation, and although I don’t think of it as a problem, others seem to immediately identify it and bring it to my attention.  Behind polite smiles, and analytical eyes is the look of genuine curiosity– There’s something wrong with ‘him’, most believe.  And while it’s partially true, the follow-up questions change the perception of things.  What I do for ‘fun’ doesn’t seem like fun to everyone, but I find joy in cooking a meal, reading a book, and writing, of course.  Incidentally, my fun keeps me out of the trouble most assume I’m getting into.  Truth be told, even for me, getting into trouble isn’t as easy as it seems…

After what seems like an interrogation with questions about my background, family life, interests, and aspirations, the affirmation of my sexual orientation leads to the assumption that I need help– Suddenly I go from anomaly to charity case, and I need to be fixed-up with a woman.  “A great catch like you should be out having fun”,  I’m told with a devilish grin… Yet, during the intrusive interview I mentioned what I like to do for fun–  Yes, sex is fun, but I think that’s just a given on most people’s list; do I really need to mention it?  Am I not allowed to reserve a small amount of dignity and class?  Having been in a number of long-term relationships, I really haven’t explored the simplicity of the single life for a long period of time.  And while I’m presently doing that, it seems many people, including family seem to take issue with that.  I can recognize the genuine good feelings and intentions of playing matchmaker– Perhaps it’s the experience of creating a connection between two strangers with the possibility of love.  Whatever the reason, being single brings out the matchmaker in people who have no business doing so.

Indeed I enjoy my alone time, and of course I enjoy the soothing presence of a woman however, I don’t see my situation as a problem.  Being uninhibited is freeing, and keeping it strictly single helps to avoid, and flirt with trouble too.  Interestingly, it seems only when I start thinking about the ‘shoulds’ and comparing myself to friends who are in relationships that I seem to get into the real trouble…