The Hunter Has Become The Huntress: Holiday Edition

by The Writer

Holiday Huntress in Natural Habitat

It’s The Thought That Counts…

While most people condemn the holiday season and dismiss it as nothing more than hyped-up commercialism gone wild, it does bring together the shopper and the non-shopper.  The seasoned shopper who hunts for bargains regularly in the wild is well trained for the Christmas season.  They can be done early, or leave it until closer to D-day; in either case they know how to find the great deal and the right gift.  The non-shopper, the retired shopper who hasn’t had to hunt for bargains since last year makes a rare appearance in the bustling department stores and malls in an attempt to use their aged skills to sniff out a good deal.  However, with the added stress of the season, and a daunting ‘to-buy’ list, those out-0f-shape shoppers just aren’t fit for the retail jungle.  Furthermore, most non-shoppers believe their grocery hunting skills with suffice during the shopping madness.

The union of the the top and bottom hunters are overwhelming for the slew of ‘seasonal help’ hires, who are tasked with the learning curve of the job, and the attitude of the ‘past-thier-prime’ hunters.  This fact alone–togetherness is a good reason to rejoice. Furthermore, tis’ the season for merriment, so the sales associates’ rehearsed smile and glazed eyes shouldn’t be held against them.  With the exhausting extended hours, long lines, and product scarcity, it comes down to one thing: it’s the thought that counts.

Attitude is everything. In most cases shopping for oneself is a therapeutic experience– but because the holidays are usually about shopping for someone else, the focus then turns to ‘everyone else’.  And once the shift happens, most people become frustrated with what others are doing, because it is usually not in sync with what you want to do.  It’s usually only the grocery store hunting experience that requires a list, and interestingly it isn’t usually a pleasant experience (on weekends)– Shopping with any sort of list takes away for the enjoyable experience yet, once everyone is crossed off, the sense of accomplishment truly feels triumphant.

There are times when the hunt gets real physical between shoppers. It’s actually just Huntresses sharpening their skills in the field, because usually the battle is over whatever child’s toy is popular for the year.  This can take away from the shopping experience, so if you don’t feel prepared to get into a shopper’s ‘fight club’ where its the survival of the fittest, stick to shopping in the higher-end stores.  Those Wal-mart shoppers seem to be in a continuous training mode and can scrap with the best of them.

Of course no holiday hunt is complete without the Boxing Day Hunt Extravaganza– This is what all the days, months and years of training are all about.  For whatever reason, Boxing Day remains the Huntress’ ultimate warrior experience– It doesn’t even have to be a resource for it to be desired– as long as the deal is good, it’s as good as gone.  The melee that ensues on this day can only be described as…the cycle of life.